But there's one other person that we must remember, and that is our partner.
They need our love and affection every bit as much as our children need it, and here's an eye opener: we need our partner's affection back!
Being a parent doesn't mean all the romance is sucked out of you. It's still there, even if it is buried a little deeper than before. You still have a marriage to nurture, and you still have a partner you love that loves you back. In fact it's going to benefit your children as well because they will probably even pick up on great relationship skills when they see how loving mommy and daddy are to each other.
Here's a few tips to keep your relationship filled with fireworks:
- Small gestures throughout the day
All joking aside take some time out of some of your days to do something sweet and romantic. Write a little note and stick it where your partner is bound to see it. It can even be on a post-it and be as simple as: " I love you, I hope you have a great day! xoxo" or even "Your a great husband and father" or for you dads out there reading this "You are a great mother and wife, I appreciate all you do" or "I love you"
You get the idea right? Or even just keeping in touch with a sweet phone call while your at work or on break. It's just simple things to let your partner know you are thinking about them and you love them.
- Have a date night
If you can't get out of the house or are a budget you can rent a movie, plan a game, feed the kids something simple and quick, get them to bed early and eat a quiet candle lit dinner just the two of you after the kiddos are asleep.
Just as long as your staying connected and getting in some personal time with each other. Just because your parents doesn't mean you don't deserve a little time for the two of you to be alone.
- Be affectionate
- Do something spontaneous
- Make sex a priority
Even if your tired and have had a hard day that doesn't mean you can't enjoy a little one on one fun time with your partner. Even if you don't feel like it at first doesn't mean you won't enjoy it. Sex relieves stress, helps you sleep better, and brings your closer together. You and your partner both need this time. You aren't monks after all. Enjoy life!
- Do things you did before you had kids
- Contribute to one another
- Count your blessings
Hopefully some of these tips will help you out. Trust me keeping the spark in your relationship after having kids is a necessity. It may not always be easy but it's going to be fun, and your going to be as in love as ever. You both need this time together. Kids are not meant to pull each other apart but rather bring one another closer together. Just as your kids need time with their parents you need time with your partner. Keeping a good relationship with one another will show your children they have two solid, stable, parents that love each other. They will learn good skills they will carry their whole lives, and when they bring their own spouse and kids to your seventieth anniversary they will have so many great stories to tell about how you two have been in love since before they can remember.